iraqistan

All dumb people should have warning labels. Big, bright, easy-to-read warning labels printed right on their foreheads so when I approach them I know exactly what I am in for.

They don’t have to worry about discrimination. People still buy cigarettes despite those warning labels being on the package for many years. Then again, I don’t see how someone could be chemically addicted to talking to the clinically dumb.

Today I had to explain to one of my Soldiers exactly why he couldn’t wear his windbreaker out if he was going to talk to anyone outside our office. Really, he couldn’t wear it if he was going to talk to me, either. I had to explain that anything that you would find printed on the mudflap for a commercial semi-truck is not something that should be emblazoned on the sleeve of someone who claims to be a professional and someone whom I am supposed to trust to talk to people well above his rank. He didn’t seem to get it. I kicked him out of my office and told him if he wants to talk to me further he will need to remove his jacket so I can talk to him without the image of two naked ladies sitting back-to-back staring from his sleeve. He seemed sad that I didn’t like his new jacket.

These warning labels may yet save society from the stupid. Or at least save me from putting my head through a wall…